Realist- My mother is very down to earth. She believes in making the wisest choice in every aspect of her life. This trait would make her the best of business women simply because she would be able to cut through all the insignificant problems to find the head of the snake and make that her project for that moment. Unfortunately that also means that most jokes are not appreciated by her. Let me explain. If you were take the most common joke of all “why did the chicken cross the road” you wouldn’t get past that line right there before you would hear “ Well that’s ridiculous. Chickens are smart animals and would never cross a busy road. Wait, my real question is who let the chicken out? I mean eggs are expensive and that chicken is too valuable. If that was my kid I would punish him if he let something like the chicken out.” At this point you would abandon the joke, walk down the hall and begin to ponder the mysteries of the universe, all the while you listen to your mother talk and mumble to herself about how stupid it was to let the chicken out.
Brain Ninja- Yes this sounds rather silly and harmless but bear with me please. Lets a simple scenario that can be adapted to fit most any situation. First we will take a sunny blue bird sky Saturday morning after a long week. You are sitting in your pajamas eating cereal around the time of 1045 because, after all, it is Saturday and it’s a day to let it all hang out and enjoy it right? Shortly after you are just wrapping up the best of the Saturday morning cartoons mother approaches you about going outside to play since its such a beautiful day. You then express your desire not to go outside and she in a chipper tone says something of the effect of “ Great, I was so hoping you wouldn’t want to do that. Lets go clean out the garage, wash the dogs, detail the cars, put up a new fence, and recreate the statue of liberty for that flower bed by the back patio!” At this point she has officially ninja chopped your primary motor cortex and you find yourself running down the hall, rapidly changing clothes and diving out your bedroom window.
Green thumb- This is the one that I am most proud about my mother and it’s a trait she passed down to me although I don’t as often times use it. To help you grasp this example you must first go out and find the most dead, and driest twig you can find. Now go buy a bag of multi purpose sand, the kid you use for sandboxes for kids. Now put this is a pot and place it in the desert with no water. Come back a week later and tell me how many leaves have sprouted. Chances are it will be standing there just as you placed it. Now I am willing to bet a years salary that if you tell my mother where that twig is and let her go place her hands on it and a week later that twig will have grown nine feet, be full of leaves, and bear 17 different kinds of fruit all perfectly ripe and ready for the picking. Now if your mom you then take a before and after picture of the twig, make some sort of baked dish, and post on Hammock Tracks your success.
Happy Birthday Mom. Y’all have a good night.
Something You May Not Know About Savannah - Part 1
Something You May Not Know About Savannah - Part 3
This post is linked here: